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Once again, let me say a big THANK YOU to everyone who has purchased my music and supports my career. I greatly appreciate it. I was told about some problems with the CD Baby website regarding purchasing my CD - but everything seems to be working again. Also, if you can't buy it for some reason via the web, you can always purchase it over the phone at: 1-800-BUYMYCD (1-800-289-6923).
Thinking about my career, and the path that has led me to today, one of the things I am realizing is how much emotions have played a part. I find it fascinating that the society I live in doesn't allow for many emotions other than feeling good. What I've come to see, is that life is full of many emotions: extreme joy to extreme pain; overwhelming excitement to paralyzing fear; complete boredom to all encompassing love; lust to repulsion; and on and on. I think we all feel all of these things. But we have been trained not to experience them (unless they are the feel good emotions). We numb them, try to ignore them, divert them into something else, try to change the way we are thinking about them, turn them into another emotion, make them into something "positive", rationalize them away (or at least away from feeling them at that moment), and intellectualize the emotion rather than actually feel it. For some reason(I don't fully know why) I have been allowing myself to feel. Many different emotions - including overwhelming emotions that I thought if I felt, I'd never recover from. Having come out of a dark, dark period, full of loss and pain, I can look back and see that allowing myself to feel and experience the feelings that were there, allowed me to grow beyond them. It has brought me closer to finding my "true" self. I don't know what that means exactly, but I do have a sense of it. I can see it in my music. As I've said in previous blogs, there is more "me" in my music than ever before. Not that the songs are about me (many of them are not), but what I want to say is more clear to me, and I'm able to say it in a way I couldn't in the past. I feel this has all made my music deeper. That is why I call the music from my latest CD, "Ready", "emotional trip-hop". The music has a trip-hop or "chill" vibe, but is all about emotion. And from where I sit now - today, emotion is life. Not to be run by ones emotions, but to acknowledge and feel them. To be alive. It has given me a clearer head and bigger heart. |
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I've said several times in my blog that I don't want to do concert reviews. And for the most part, I haven't. I've been to many more concerts (even within the past few months alone) than I mention. However, when there is something that inspires me or gets me thinking, I do like to share it. So...
Over this past weekend, I went to the Hollywood Bowl to see Diana Ross in concert. It got me thinking about music and shows and concerts. It was a wonderful concert - she was in very good voice and looked amazing. She sang many hits from her 40+ year career (which are way too many for one concert). Everything from the songs with the Supremes ("Baby Love", "My World is Empty Without You", "Where DId Out Love Go", "Stop in the Name of Love"), to her solo hits (including "Ain't No Mountain High Enough", "Love Hangover", "I'm Coming Out", "This House", "The Boss", "The Theme from Mahogany") and her covers (including "Why Do Fools Fall in Love", and "I Will Survive"). For me, the two standout songs of the evening were her solo version of "Endless Love" (originally a duet with Lionel Richie), and the song "Don't Explain" (one of two Billie Holiday songs sung in her ode to her film "Lady Sings the Blues"). Both were moving and emotional - and you could see and hear that Diana the lyrics. I must say, it was the best performance of "Don't Explain" I've ever heard. I'm still singing the song in my head. I never before understood he depth of the lyrics to that song. And for both of those songs, she just stood there and sang. It reminded me that music itself is the key. Not the dancing and glitz and lighting effects you see at most concerts these days. What is most moving is the communication through music. There is some experience that gets shared or transfered by a great performer singing a song. It is magical. That being said, Diana did four costume changes (from one glittery dress to another - looking incredible in all of them), and was totally the Diva one expected her to be. Her concert was full of glamour, which you don't see much of today. It was all out style and beauty - very classy. And very refreshing. Another thing it brings to mind is how wonderful it is to see different artists at work. Each one unique and special in their own way. Almost like going to dinner at someone's house. You get a brief glimpse into them and their world. |
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In the midst of life, I found this incredibly moving quote - which I thought I'd posted part of in a previous bog, but looking back I see I had not. It speaks eloquently about the creative process for all artists, and is something I've felt and even touched upon in a few blogs in the past (most notably the one titled, "Creativity"). There isn't much more to say about it, except that I am in awe of how Ms. Graham came up with such exact and truthful words...
"There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. If you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is; nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours, clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep directly open to and aware of the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction at any time. There is only a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than others.
- Martha Graham |
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Recently at my vocal lesson, I ran across a singer who just started studying with my vocal coach. This student was told by his previous teacher to use his throat muscles while singing. My coach, Joel Ewing, was flabbergasted to say the least. Even I, who have studied the mechanics of the voice to some degree, was bewildered. I can't even begin to think how one would use their neck muscles while singing! It reminded me how many bad vocal teachers there are out there. I've run across a few in my years singing. One of the most widely incorrect notions is to "sing from your diaphragm". I've been told that many times by other singers and people who think they know about singing. It is totally incorrect. You can't "sing from your diaphragm", or hold it down, or push it down or any of that. The diaphragm moves automatically when you breathe. Period. And singing is a function of two muscle groups acting upon the vocal chords (which are passive). Healthy singing (where you won't hurt your chords or get polyps, etc.) is having a balance of those two muscle groups (the arytenoids and the cricothyroids). It isn't from "moving" your diaphragm, tightening your butt, putting a cork in your mouth, and certainly not from doing anything with your neck muscles. And once you have that balance, the breathe, along with everything else, falls into place. I find it fascinating that there are SO MANY singing teachers who don't know anything about the voice. They are all about controlling the breathe, and holding, and pushing, and nothing about the function of the two muscle groups that are the core of the voice. It is really appalling.
I too, have had a very interesting journey with my voice. My first teacher (years ago), told me I'd never be a singer. I believed her and stopped singing for a couple years. I eventually went to a second teacher, who told me I had an amazing and rare gift, and had to pursue singing at all costs. Shortly after that, I moved to Los Angeles and found my current teacher, Joel Ewing, who knows everything about the voice. And with him, I've gotten my voice to a place where it functions properly. And that, in turn, has given me great flexibility - allowing me to have many options when singing. I can choose HOW I want to sing a phrase - instead of only being able to sing it one way. This was never more evident to me than on my new CD, "Ready". I found myself singing each of the songs a bit differently - depending on what I wanted to express with each song. It made the process of recording this CD incredibly fulfilling and exciting.
It always boggles my mind when I hear incorrect methods of singing being taught. It is very sad, and I think about all the great voices that will never be.
On a different note, a great big THANK YOU to all who have purchased my new CD! Thank you, thank you, thank you! And thanks also, to all of you who have sent me all the incredible emails. I truly, deeply appreciate them! |
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Thanks to everyone who has purchased "Ready"!! I so appreciate the support, and hope you truly enjoy the music! The CD has already sold out at CD BABY, but for those of you on the waiting list and that haven't ordered yet, there are more on the way!! They should be there any day now!!
Thanks also for all the emails and messages I've been getting regarding the new music and site. It means a lot! |
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After a long wait, I am proud to present my latest CD, "Ready'! You can sample all the songs on my website, as well as sign up for my newsletter to receive up to date information on shows, new music, special offers, and promotions! You can also purchase CDs and downloads from CD Baby, and DigStation! "Ready" will also be available on iTunes and many other music sites in the weeks to come!
This has been a work of love, and I'm so happy to finally put it out in the world! It contains 11 songs, all written and sung by me. All are brand new, except for "As We Rise", which is a brand new version of a song never before released on CD. I look at this CD as a journey, both for the listener and for me as an artist.
For the listener, the songs somewhat form a life journey - from childhood ("Boy"), through self doubt ("Going Blind"), to old age ("Lines On My Face"), and finally to self acceptance ("I've Arrived").
As an artist, my journey was similar. Starting from a place of not knowing anything (other than wanting to make a trip-hop flavored CD), I found myself with a new sense of openness. Many of the songs changed their form (lyrics and music) several times before production began. I wasn't attached to any ideas or intended outcomes to any of the songs. I let them (the songs) dictate what direction they would take. They guided me, rather than my shaping them. It was a very exciting and new process for me.
After an unanticipated wait (you can read more about that in my past blogs), I am THRILLED to release "Ready"! As I say in the CD's liner notes, "i hope you enjoy taking this musical journey as much as I've enjoyed creating it!"
GIve a listen, and share it with friends!!
Thanks for all your support!!
Jay |
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| On the eve of the release of my new CD, "Ready", - which should be released any day now, I can see the journey and process I went through creating it from the beginning until now. I wasn't aware during the making of it, but for me, it was a course in being unattached to outcomes. As I stated in an earlier blog, I really went with the flow of the songs. I stood outside my mind and preconceived notions and choices, and "listened" to what the songs were telling me to do. It was a new and freeing way for me to work. And I am incredibly proud of this CD! I can't wait to share it!! It will be released any day now.
The process I went through reminds me of this quote by Vicki Noble:
"The art just wants to be made. It pushes through the vehicle (the person) into manifest form". - Vickie Noble |
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Just letting you know that my next CD, "Ready", is finished and will be released very shortly! It should be available in the beginning of June - within the next two weeks!! In addition, my website will be totally new in look and content. Come back soon to hear the new songs! |
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I just returned from a getaway to Costa Rica. What an incredible place! I stayed in 4 different areas within the country, my favorite being the southern pacific Osa Peninsula. In that part of the country, I stayed in an Ecolodge named "Lapa Rios" - a spectacular place! It is in the middle of a rainforest with no phone, fax, TV, or email accessibility. I was surrounded by life! I saw Toucans, Macaws, Parakeets, Hummingbirds, Iguanas, Monkeys, Sloths, Butterflies, Coatis, Tayras, Peccaries, Bats, Snakes, Geckos, Frogs, Hawks, Eagles, Kingfishers, Roseate Spoonbills, Quetzals, Vultures, Gurassows, Aracaris, Woodpeckers, Woodcreepers, White-tipped Sicklebills, Tanagers, Scorpions, Walking Stick Bugs, different types of Ants, Grasshoppers (the size of flashlights), Spiders, Dolphins, Crocodiles, Caimans, Crabs, Crayfish, and much, much more wildlife! No matter where you looked, something was there. A butterfly. A bird. A monkey. It gave me a sense of what life must have been like many, many years ago - before the industrial revolution and the population boom. When humans were more in proportion with the rest of the world. I could see how life depends on life - and it all works together. In the rainforest, Strangler Fig Trees grow from seeds excreted by birds and monkeys on the tops of other trees. Sometimes overtaking and killing the original tree completely (which then decomposes, leaving the new Fig Tree hollow in the middle where the old tree was), it becomes a home for animals, birds and reptiles to live inside. There are also Jaguars in the forest (which I didn't see) as well as other cats, and I asked a guide if they ever attacked people. His reply was, "No. There is enough food in the forest that they don't need to". It really made me realize how out of balance most of the world is. Termites in the forest don't eat homes, they eat dead tree branches - from the overwhelming supply of trees. In my "developed" environment, there are so many humans and not so many other forms of wildlife. No wonder pigeons, other birds, raccoons and squirrels often try to eat food left by humans. By comparison to what I saw there, they have slim pickings for "natural" food. And coming back to Los Angeles is quite strange. My first reaction was "where are all the trees"? Before I visited Costa Rica, I thought my neighborhood was pretty lush and full of birds. But there is no comparison with the life present in Osa. The air there is full of sounds (and sights) of birds, and Howler Monkeys, and insects, and life. Even at night, (which made me think of Times Square in New York - it was that noisy), it was an orchestra of insects, birds, animals rustling through trees and bushes, frogs, and snakes. I had to get used to that, but I must say it was pretty amazing. Overwhelming. How great to know there is still a place (even if it is so small as about 20 by 35 miles long) with so much diverse life in it. I hope it never gets cut down.
I hope I don't sound up on my soapbox again, but it was a very strong experience - and I do love this planet! It is a bit jarring coming back, and in contrast, news of my CD seems so insignificant - but for me personally it isn't!! Just letting you all know that I am progressing along, and still hope to release "Ready" before the end of next month!! I will keep you posted as I know more. I am biting my nails with excitement each day as I get closer to the release!
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Finally - great news!! I have finished all recording on my upcoming CD, which is titled "Ready"! As I've said many times in previous blogs, I am VERY excited about this CD! It has been such an amazing experience creating it. I've learned a lot about myself, my creativity and the creative process. The CD will contain 11 songs - ten new songs as well as a remake of my song "As We Rise" (the old version is currently available only as a download - and will no longer be available once the new CD hits the streets). "Ready" will be released in May (as long as nothing else unforeseen happens) at an exact date still to be determined. Stay tuned!
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